In The Still of The Night

A few days ago, no, weeks ago, at the 3rd day of my staying here after coming from Jakarta, I was wondering about the happiness that I looked in my father's eyes. He smiled a lot, laughed so often, and enjoyed most of his time without shouting angrily, even when things didn't go as he expected...

He looked so happy it made me confused as well as annoyed, because, I don't know why, he teased me often.

Perhaps, if that was MY DAD, I mean, if it was what my dad usually did, I wouldn't have been so surprised, confused, yet happy because there's not horror atmosphere at home.
At that time, I thought that was the best days...
But I don't know why suddenly a thought came, it pushed me to wonder if God wouldn't let such things go forever...
No, no need forever, at least, for a while...
Perhaps an experience that strengthen the belief there's no happiness that last long in this earthly life makes me think like that...
Days after days the water still calmed, until three days before New Year, I heard a bad news about my father's situation from his previous 'project'. A project that's a side job outside his formal one, of which I actually never disagree and eventually the end that we think was good is not an end. It's only a beginning for something annoying. Something that gives a headache. Something...something that worse our year end. Something that makes my father's day go bad. Something that takes the happiness that I see from my father's eyes so fast...that I don't even have time to record it well in my mind...

Suddenly, I see my father's eyes go red, he's so tense...
He easily goes angry, shouts for wrongs we do, looks tired, has no sense of humor.
What happens to him right now really affects our home...
My mother is often shouted at for some things that she, in my father's opinion, can't manage well
and so are my bro, sis, and I. (LOL)
Our home is quite tense, too, at least in my eyes, following my father's change of mood.

I really want my, you know, my-some-day-before-end-of-year father who looks so happy, joyful, warns his child in a quite nice way but enough to make me and my bro and sis reflect...
I don't mind being teased if that will make him happy
At least he can be more at ease...

God... if You could change my father's state of heart really fast from bright to gray, would You mind doing otherwise, too?